first check up of 2018

we are heading in to the cardiologist for our first check up of 2018. i can’t believe it’s been an entire month since our last appointment. we went from going weekly when we left the hospital in october to bi weekly to monthly because otto was doing so good. so now we are returning after our first full month between appointments.

i feel like i’m on a roller coaster. one minute i’m like boom we got this he’s doing great. the next minute i’m like omg he’s coughing, he’s a bit sweaty is he in heart failure again and i don’t know it? it’s such a head game. i would say that 90% of the time i’m good. he’s so good. he’s so happy even now that we have a second tooth coming in. he is just a good boy. i’m excited today to see how much he weighs at the doctor today i think we might have a 16lber on our hands which would be awesome!

this morning after doing my devotions i prayed and actually caught myself saying “I know what our future eventually will be but please prepare me for it” i could just picture God going “woah woah woah you do? well then what am I here for? I’m sorry, i thought I was cheer captain”. (God is sarcastic to me some times). I actually laughed at my own insanity which might have made me even more insane. who knows. but the truth is i don’t know the future. i wish i did. i really wish i did. but i’m just a normal human. i’m rambling now but these are the thoughts that circle through my head from time to time.

in my devotions this morning there was a sentence that i’ve decided will be my phrase for today.

“in thanking you in all things, i am saved from discouragement in all things” – ann voskamp

so here we go again in to the doctor. i’m grateful for these check ins. i’m even more grateful to head home and get more time under our belt.

thank you so much everyone for your continued support and prayers for us and our sweet boy!

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